Scoles: Father Bernard Scoles

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James Bernard Scoles (Father Bernard Scoles)

Priest, Diocese Hamilton, Ontario.  Ordained 1962. Spent time at Southdown  – received favourable reports.  Recyled after it was known to Diocesan officials that he was a molester: molested again.

1996:  guilty plea to three counts of indecent assault and one of sexual assault involving four boys. Sentenced to four years.  Died 20 August 2011 at age 78.

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Bishops of the Diocese of Hamilton from the time of Father Bernard Scoles’ ordination until his death: Joseph Francis Ryan  (16 August 1937 – 27 March 1973); Paul Francis Reding  (14 September 1973 – 08 December 1983); Anthony Frederick Tonnos (02 May 1984 – 24 September 2010) ; David Douglas Crosby, O.M.I. (24 Sep 2010 – – )

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Garrett Funeral Chapels website

FATHER JAMES SCOLES

Father James Bernard Scoles of Ayton, passed away at the Hanover and District Hospital on Saturday, August 20, 2011 at the age of 79 years. Dear brother of Rosemary and John Murphy and Joan and Pat Horrigan all of Normanby twp. Also survived by a number of nieces, nephews, great nieces and great nephews.

Ordained on June 2, 1962, Father Scoles served in the parishes of St. Anthony’s and St. Patrick’s in Hamilton, St. Basil’s in Brantford, Holy Rosary in Milton and St. Teresa’s in Kitchener.

Visitation at St. Peter’s Catholic Church, Ayton, on Tuesday, August 23, 2011 from 10:00am until the time of funeral mass at 11:00am. Interment St. Peter’s Catholic Cemetery, Ayton. Memorial donations to the charity of one’s choice would be appreciated as expressions of sympathy.

(a similar notice appeared on lifenews.ca)

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The following information is drawn from the Canadian Catholic Directories (CCCD) which I happen to have on hand, the 1980 Ontario Catholic Directory (OCD) and media (M)

23 August 2011:  funeral Mass at St. Peter’s Catholic Church in Ayton. Interment St. Peter’s Catholic Cemetery, Ayton, Ontario

20 August 2011:  Died.

2011:  P.O. Box 178, Ayton, Ontario (CCCD) (misspelled as Scole.  Index lists him thus:  SCOLE JAMES – (1962) (Ham*)  The asterisk by Ham. indicates incardinated outside Canada but serving in Hamilton Diocese. I checked with the Chancellor of Hamilton Diocese, Monsignor Kerr, and was told that upon release from prison Father Scoles lived “in retirement from pastoral ministry” in his native village of Ayton.   Father Scoles ‘belonged’ to the Diocese of Hamilton from the time of his ordination until his death.)

2010:  P.O. Box 178, Ayton, Ontario (CCCD) (misspelled as Scole – Index lists him thus: SCOLE JAMES – (1962) (Ham*) The asterisk by Ham. indicates incardinated outside Canada but serving in Hamilton Diocese.  See above.)

2002, 2000, 1999, 1998, 1997:  not listed (CCCD)

1996, 1995, 1994:  P.O. Box 115, Ayton, Ontario.  519-665-2244 (CCCD)

1996:  according to media, not allowed to engage in public ministry (M)

1993:  Ayton, Ontario  (CCCD)

1991:  Ayton, Ontario Phone 519-665-2244 (CCCD)  (St. Peter’s Church in Ayton is a Mission of St. Mary in Mount Forest.  I see nothing to indicate he was serving there, but, he may have been.)

around 1987: housekeeper at St. Theresa’s complained that boys were spending the night at the rectory.  According to media reports, Scoles was “urged”  to resign (M)

sent for another round of ‘treatment’ at Southdown.

1985 – 1986:  Pastor at St. Theresa’s, Kitchener, Ontario.

1984:  molested a teen in Milton parish – that offence not reported until ten years later when victim went to police (M)

Fall 1983:  assigned as associate pastor Holy Rosary in Milton, Ontario.  Put in charge of altar boys.  Parishioners were not told that he was a molester (M)

conviction related to sex abuse while he was serving at Holy Rosary

1971-1983:  St. Basil Roman Catholic Church in Brantford, Ontario (M)

1982:   Sent to Southdown after a mother reported he had sexually abused her son.  Received favourable reports from therapists in Southdown.  Put back into a parish in Milton Ontario (M)

1980:  St. Basil Roman Catholic Church in Brantford, Ontario – with Father R.J. King (OCD).

1973-74:  St. Basil Roman Catholic Church, Brantford, Ontario (Pastor Father P.L. Duffy vf) (CCCD)

some of the sex abuse convictions relate to his time at St. Basil’s

1971-72:  listed as “Notary” in index. Address 700 King St. W., which is the address for the Hamilton Diocesan Centre.

I have been advised that between 1971 and 1972 Father Scoles served as Chaplian at the Hamilton General Hospitial (P)

1968-69, 1967:  St. Anthony of Padua Roman Catholic Church, Hamilton, Ontario (Pastor Father S. V. Sardo)

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Priest gets five years for sexually abusing boys

Canadian Press

February 12, 1996  21.03 EST

MILTON, Ont. (CP)

A retired Roman Catholic priest who molested altar boys has been sentenced to five years in prison for what the judge described as sex acts of “the most abhorrent nature.”

“We’re dealing with a most serious type of sexual misbehavior,” Justice Chris Speyer said Monday.

James Scoles, 63, earlier pleaded guilty to three counts of indecent assault and one of sexual assault involving four boys.

Court heard he molested the boys in church ‑‑ even as he heard confession.

Scoles showed little emotion during sentencing and said nothing  as he was led away in handcuffs.

The charges against him involved sex acts while he was a priest at St. Basil’s parish in Brantford from 1971 to 1982 and at Holy Rosary Church in Milton in 1983.

Scoles was forced to resign in 1987 after a housekeeper at St. Theresa’s parish in Kitchener complained about the priest having young boys stay overnight in the rectory.

Several of Scoles’ supporters testified last week that the priest told them he had little recollection of the allegations against him. He told one man that the victims weren’t very credible and exaggerated the charges.

The remarks indicate Scoles was trying to minimize responsibility for what he did, Speyer said.

However, the judge noted Scoles had brought spiritual comfort to a number of people and said it’s unlikely he will reoffend after he gets out of prison.

One of the priest’s victims, a 27‑year‑old Brantford man, said in an interview that no sentence could erase the effects of the abuse he suffered over several years.

He and an older brother were molested while they were altar boys at St. Basil’s church.

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Diocese knew of abusive priest: First allegation surfaced in 1982

Hamilton Spectator

03 February 1996

Paul Legall

A Roman Catholic priest was allowed to continue working with
children for almost five years after the Hamilton diocese first
learned he had been accused of sexually abusing an altar boy.

During that period, Bernard Scoles sexually abused a second altar
boy, and may have had inappropriate relations with several other
children.

Despite two separate reports of suspected abuse – in 1982 and 1987
-church officials never alerted police.

Since 1978, provincial legislation has made it mandatory for anyone
working with children who has “reasonable grounds to suspect” child
abuse to report it to authorities.

In 1984, the act was amended to explicitly identify the professions
with a special responsibility for reporting suspicions of abuse.
Priests and other clergy are part of that group, along with
teachers, doctors and others who regularly come into professional
contact with children.

A spokesman for the diocese said Scoles’ sexual transgressions
would be handled differently today.

Father Gerard Bergie, chancellor of the diocese, said then-Bishop
Paul Reding had little experience dealing with such issues when he
was confronted in 1982 with reports Scoles had sexually abused a
youth in his Brantford parish.

“I can’t speak for Bishop Reding. But if people knew then what we
know now, he would not be put back in a parish where he was in a
relationship with children,” he said.

The church has also adopted a protocol since the Scoles affair that
dictates authorities be contacted if abuse is believed to have
occurred, he said.

Scoles – who once taught at Bishop Ryan High School and ministered
at St. Anthony’s and St. Patrick’s churches in Hamilton – has since
admitted molesting four boys.

Last year, he pleaded guilty to one count of sexual assault and
three counts of indecent assault for sexually abusing children in
Milton and Brantford between 1971 and 1984. He will be sentenced
Feb. 12.

Court documents reveal the church first learned of Scoles’ abuse in
1982 when a Brantford mother complained the priest had molested her
son. Scoles was quietly removed from St. Basil’s parish and sent to
Southdown, a treatment facility for priests near Aurora.

During his six months at Southdown, he received favorable reports
from his therapists and was welcomed back into an active ministry in
the fall of 1982 with his appointment as associate pastor at Holy
Rosary Parish in Milton.

“We definitely want him to return to a parish ministry …,” Bishop
Reding wrote at the time. The bishop, who died in 1983, offered
“unqualified” support for Scoles.

“It was felt at the time he was able to handle his depression and
sexuality,” lawyers for the diocese later argued in a civil lawsuit
filed by one of the victims.

In 1984, Scoles molested a teen in the Milton parish, although that
incident would not come to light until almost 10 years later when
the victim complained to police.

John Bradley, 67, a long-time member of Holy Rosary, said
churchgoers weren’t told anything about Scoles’ background when he
came to the parish.

He can’t understand why Scoles was put in charge of the altar boys
and youth group at the church. “It’s like putting the fox in the hen
house,” he said.

In 1985, Scoles was transferred to St. Theresa’s parish in
Kitchener as a full pastor.

Less than two years later, the diocese stepped in and urged him to
resign from the parish after a housekeeper complained that young
boys were spending the night at the rectory. Bishop Anthony Tonnos
was not available for comment.

Scoles was sent for another stint at Southdown, where he told
therapists he had invited the boys to the rectory because of a “need
for physical affection without genital contact.”

Civil court records indicate he admitted occasionally “overstepping
the bounds.”

Southdown therapists recommended against sending him back to a
parish because they felt he’d have trouble controlling his sexual
urges.

Scoles is still officially a priest, but he is no longer allowed to
conduct a public ministry. He declined comment.

Father John Loftus – a psychology professor and former director of
Southdown – said the psychiatric profession was relatively ignorant
about sexual disorders when the church first learned of Scoles’
actions.

“In 1982, my guess is that it was seen as a moral failing and that
(church leaders) would have been more optimistic about the success
of treatment because the whole science of diagnosis and treatment of
sexual disorders was in its infancy,” he said.

Often, he added, when a priest was sent to Southdown after abusing
boys, his behavior was blamed on alcohol – “Oh, father had too much
to drink.”

“In my 20 years of working with the clergy, I have not seen a
systematic coverup (of sexual abuse),” Rev. Loftus said.

“Were there mistakes made? Errors in judgment? Yes.”

39 Responses to Scoles: Father Bernard Scoles

  1. Glenna says:

    WHAT ABOUT US……THE ONES WHO SUFFER NOW…..WHOS TO HELP US WHEN WE CAN NO LONGER FEND FOR OURSELVES…..WHAT ABOUT THE PAIN AND THE SUFFERING…..THE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS….NOT KNOWING HOW TO TRUST OR LOVE…..HOW CAN THIS KIND OF PAIN BE FORGOTTEN….HOW CAN ONE PERSON TAKE AWAY EVERYTHING THATS DEAR IN LIFE……LEAVING US WITH MONSTERS…..LEAVING US WITH DARKNESS…..FEELING UNWORTHTHY….LOVELESS…..HOW CAN ANYONE HELP US

  2. Sylvia says:

    Glenna, were you sexually abused by Scoles? Is that your anguish? I don’t want to pry, but your pain sounds so deep

  3. Sylvia says:

    Thank you Bob. I have updated the Father Bernard Scoles with that and other information.

    As I checked the Canadian Catholic Church Directories I noticed that the two recent directories indicated that Father Scoles was incardinated outside the country, and those after a failure to list him in the CCCDs for several years.

    The CCCD does make errors.

    I contacted Monisgnor Kerr, Chancellor of the Hamilton Diocese: Father Scoles has been incardinated with the Hamilton Diocese from the time of his ordination in 1962 until his death 20 August 2011: after his release from prison he lived “in retirement from pastoral ministry” in his native village of Ayton.

    I do hope and pray that before his death he begged for forgiveness and prayed with fervour for his unfortunate victims. I wish an eternity in Hell on no one. May God have mercy on his soul.

  4. Robert says:

    Hello Sylvia.
    I am one of the survivors. This is not a Joke. I am the Miltonian that started the investigation that Finally brought a glimmer of closure to something that ate at me.
    It happened when I was at work. At the time, I was a memorialist ( Letterer and carver of Tombstones ). I usually did 4 stones a day. One day I got the paperwork for another order. The Last name was ” Scoles “. I started to shake uncontrollably enough that I could not chisel a thing. My supervisor pulled me into the office and the name on the stone came into the conversation and I told him what had happened. It was my supervisaor that got me into talking to a concillor. From the first call to the sexual assault crisis center to the Police. There was my councillor.
    My father erupted when the Police came to the door to ask questions for the start of the case. he yelled that I was a liar and they had that priest at there house twice a month for dinners. After it was all proven, my father questioned his parental abilities.
    Today a Molester was sent to jail and Up cames the name Graham James, a molester in Canada, which in turn got me online and I found your site.
    It brings back a heap of feelings. I am also the one that took it further.
    I live far from Canada, Ontario had too many memories that slowed my progress.
    I am a Corporate Chef for a large Resort chain here in Queensland, Australia.
    I have a small hobby farm, I have a animal caregivers permit, so I have 3 Kangaroos
    Seeing your site was overwhelming as I have some writeups that I do not have.
    What he did, made alot of difference in the quality of my life.
    I am glad that he died, As I had written in my victims impact statement.

    “You will be judged for what you have done in this life. But the judgement that will be placed on you by the highest authority that you misrepresented will not be so leanient. The malediction that you left in our lives, forces us to live in challenge on earth. My God have no pity on your soul. I forgive you as a Roman Catholic should. But I will no longer have faith in anything but myself.”

    Be well and thanks for writing this blog. I will be back to see more, when I am in the right state of mind.

  5. Sylvia says:

    Thank you for sharing those painful memories Robert.

    So you were one of the unfortunate boys who was molested by Scoles after it was well known that he was a molester, and after he had been “treated.”

    And good for you for going to police!

    How fortunate you were to have a supervisor who directed you to a cousellor, and counsellor who walked beside you every step of the way.

    Your father’s initial response was/is not, unfortunately, uncommon. I am sure that after the fact he struggled terribly with guilt, both for feeling that he allowed it to happen in the first place, and then for refusing to believe you.

    It is good to hear you have been able to get away and start a new life for yourself in Australia. It sounds as though you have done well for yourself.

    And the proud owner of 3 kangaroos! That would be fun. Hard work perhaps? but, fun.

    A question Robert: If you have a copy of your Victim Impact Statement and would not be adverse to having it posted please send me a copy at [email protected].

  6. MK says:

    Does anyone know if Father Scoles sexually abused girls at all?

    • SD says:

      There has been no documented complaints or criminal charges of female molestation. Father Scoles has committed some very deviant crimes to say the least, however according to the Canadian Criminal code he was convicted and sentencedfor those crimes. He owes nothing more to this mortal planet. He is now answering to the crimes to the man he served…………..God. His justice may be more harsh, or maybe he will consider any and all good the mortal Rev James Scoles provided and forgave him. It is difficult for anyone to see past the horror he inflicted on the innocent and that will always be his legacy. However harboring feelings of hate serve no purpose but to relive the trappings of those horrible memories, freedom from them comes from forgiveness. Denounce these types of crimes in order to protect the innocent and move forward. Liberate yourselves from hate. All the good he did is overshadowed by the darkness of his deviancy but let a spec of light from the good shine through that darkness.

      • PJ says:

        I had to reread what you wrote a few times to be sure of what I understood from your note. You expect victims to just forgive and forget? You expect victims to move forward….to just move forward….like it was as easy as moving forward after an argument??? And then you expect victims to find a spec of light from the good he did to shine through??? How clear it is that you do not understand suffering from the terrible hurt caused by these perverted collars! How clear it is that you have no idea what it’s like to be a victim/survivor…why don’t you do some soul searching on what hurt you have caused some of us with your nonchalant remarks. You sound like you are either a collar yourself, or a blinded parishioner…which is it?

        • SD says:

          I am a victim of this man. My point is simple, free yourself from being a victim and survivor by letting go of it. This is in no way intended to make anyone feel bad. Free yourself by finding a positive from a horrific negative. If you hang on to the memories you relive the abuse over and over again. In a sense the perpetrator wins time and time again. This particular one has passed, no more blood can be extracted from the stone. Clearly I have offended you by suggesting we look for a spec of light to shine through from the good deeds he did perform while still alive. That was not my intention but rather to offer a therapeutic approach. I will never forget what happened to me, but I have to move forward with my life and be liberated from the weight of darkness. The face of evil has many masks of deception, at times he wore one of those masks. At other times his intentions were good. I am a survivor and if I let the bitter memories of what happen navigate my life whats the point of being a survivor? I will not let anyone control my life that way. I am free and will not allow him to make me a victim. So to answer your last question of am I either a “collar” or a “blinded parishioner”, I am neither.

          • PJ says:

            Thank you so much for your reply…I feel better about your intentions as you now explained them. You have risen above that collar’s abuse and that is a good thing. You are charitable in your words on looking for the light of good he may have also done…sorry, I can never go there. I suppose with all the atrocities Hitler committed, there could be some good (Volkswagons, rocket technology), but very few would attribute them to him. That is how I feel about pervert collars…any good they may have done have been wiped out by their deliberate actions of abuse and deception…period. They never showed any mercy towards their young and innocent victims did they? Anyway, I admire you for responding to my earlier note and explaining things. Take care.

  7. JG says:

    SD,
    You are making a valiant effort but it is obvious you are still “coping” in your own way, just like PJ and so many others. It is a struggle for everyone and we can convince others we have reached a “plateau” of well-being, beyond other victims …I read you again and I wish you well. You probably didn’t realize but you so much as said it is still not easy. We all need to convince ourselves we are OK!

    When you say: ” I am a victim of this man.”, in your very first line and repeat your daily mantra before continuing with:”I am free and will not allow him to make me a victim.”….?

    We all know the kettle is black and we are all in “the-rapeutic” black pots .
    After the “forget about it” period you must come to “I will not allow another child to go through that” stage and try to make a difference.
    That is my take on the people who may have “bitter memories” on this site but chose to heal and share in their healing so that this abuse can come to an end.
    Getting up in the morning is about “survival”; sharing your lunch with some unknown is about “caring”…There should be no end to that.
    There is still someone who has remained silent and it may be his/her time…
    So we listen…

    …Who is the “perpetrator”, again??!!..

    jg

  8. P.P. says:

    I am not a victim of this man, but I did attend his parish at St. Basil’s in the early 80’s was a very young boy, but I do know one of the victims…not personally, but I went to school with him. He was a few years older than me. He came from a very good family who lived in a very nice area of the city. My thoughts and prayers have been with the victims of his sins ever since I learned of the situation around the age of 20. My parents also had Scholes over for dinner on a couple of occasions. He blessed the house we moved into in the late 70’s, I had him bless the shoe cupboard…as it seemed important to me at the age of four. I walk through the whole house with my mother and him as he blessed each room with “holy water”. I gave him my first confession in grade 2 in the school gymnasium. As a young child innocent to the world, I knew him as a good man because my parents spoke so highly of him…the things one find’s out later in life about the world can be disturbing and haunting. I was a very timid child at that age and would not have spoken out if anything were ever to have happened to me as I was raised in the age of stranger danger, I wouldn’t have known better to speak against an adult. The most difficult responsibility as Christians is forgiveness. I hope this man has not turned anyone away from God or taken it out on him. I hope this comment has not offended anybody as it was not my purpose.

  9. P.P. says:

    To be clear… The disturbing and hunting things Many of us learned about the world later in life, is nothing compared to the people that had to suffer through them, and now still. My intentions were not meant to minimize anybody’s pain.

  10. Sylvia says:

    I have been advised that between 1971 and 1972 Father Scoles was serving as Chaplain at the Hamilton General Hospital.

    (In the 1971-72 Catholic Church Directory he is listed as “Notary” with the address for the Hamilton Diocesan Centre. )

  11. Mad says:

    This is my first time ever talking about this.I have been trying to forget St basil’s.Know one would believe me I told Mr Jim Cameron. What was happening .I got the strap. He would come for super and after take us to the bedroom to confess my sins and thats when he would start. Also he had a cot at the end of his bed for sleep overs.The nuns new what was going on{ Sister nowela}? Now I know I was not the only one.40 years later still in pain.

    • Sylvia says:

      I am so sorry that you too suffered at the hands of this priest, but also glad that you are now able to talk out. Don’t for one moment carry the shame which belongs to Scoles and those who protected and covered up for him. The shame is theirs to bear, not yours

      My thoughts and prayers are with you Mad.

      You mention telling Jim Cameron. Who was/is Jim Cameron? It sounds as if he was a teacher at a school? Is that correct? And, one more question: approximately what year would that have been?

    • just another victim says:

      Hello Mad:

      Is the sister you mentioned that knew what was going on sister Nuala Patricia Kenny from the Sisters of Charity of Halifax?

      • Sylvia says:

        I think you are referring to the Sister Nuala Kenny who assisted in compiling the CCCBs guidelines From Pain to Hope. Sister Nuala Kenny is an American who entered the Sisters of Charity in Halifax in 1962. She pursued a medical eduction in Halifax – attained her MD from Dalhouse U in 1972. She is a medical doctor. I don’t believe this Sister Kenny was ever teaching choir in Hamilton.

      • Michael says:

        Sister Noella was a music teacher and a member of St. Joseph’s convent. She lived in the convent between St. Basil and St. Anne school in Brantford. I remember that she always wore the old style habit rather than switch to lay clothing.

    • GD says:

      Hey Mad
      Not sure where to start but I’m sure we would know each other. Cameron like the strap didn’t he? I am also surprised another priest from around that time is not named here. As a matter of fact it is very difficult to locate any information on him anywhere on the internet. Was a horrible time and place. Wish you the best.

  12. Mad says:

    Jim Cameron was the school principle.1971 -1978 St Basil’s to Christ the King..The teacher at that time were [email protected] basil’s.

  13. Mad says:

    Sister Nuala was the choir teacher at the church. All the nuns live in the same house with the priests. Right beside the church.They seen kids come in and out of there. I remember sister Nuala talk from the side of her mouth.When teaching music & singing. I’m not sure if she was from Halifax?

  14. Adam says:

    I have been abused by this monster in the early 80s , I am now in my mid 30s and
    Hope Jim burns in hell for what he did to me . How anybody can do something to an
    Innocent child is beyond me.
    Shame on the church for hiding this monster and allowing him access to children
    After it was discovered he was sick. Jim took me to baseball games (blue jays) where he
    Molested me and forced me to preform oral sex on him in his car. He was a trusted friend of our family and after reading other accounts I’m trembling as I write this because everything I hav read is like a mirror image of how he manipulated my parents by having dinners at our house. He gained the trust of my parents to be able to babysit so he could get me alone. I have been abusing drugs and alachol for almost 20 years to escape the pain, I had not been able to have a normal relationship early in life because of my fear of intimacy . I would tremble incontolably any time I tried to be intimate with another . This man robed me of a happy youth, I have been sober for the longest time in my life now and can’t escape the thoughts and memories and am tempted to escape daily back to my mind numbing habits because that is the only way I can live with myself. I don’t want my parents to ever find out about this be aye I fear the pain and guilt they will have to carry like I have had to carry my whole life will crush them.
    I have held on to these feelings too long and I am now reaching out for help , I won’t let this ruin my life ! I have two beautiful children and a loving wife that can’t understand why I’m so angry . .. I don’t know how to tell her and I don’t want to loose her respect.
    I have contacted a lawyer and I’m going to try to make this as quiet as possible so my parents don’t find out ( although I’m sure they have there suspicions ) but mark my words I’m going to pursue this as far as I can until I’m satisfied the people responsible for hiding this monster and for undermining the integrity of the church pay through the nose! This is not an attack on the religion it is something that has to be done so it does not happen to another little boy like me
    Shame on the Hamilton diocese shame on the cowards that did not stand up to this coward! I wish that steaming pile of s&$t was still alive so I could spit in his face!
    At least I know where he is buried so I can relieve my self on him as he relieved himself on me.

    • 1abandonedsheep says:

      Adam, I will pray for you this morning in Church. I will continue to pray for you until this burden of mind, body and Soul if lifted from you. Enjoy your sobriety- it comes by the Grace of God, and your cooperation with His Grace. Been there, done that. GOD Bless !!!

    • Sylvia says:

      First, Adam, I am so sorry that you were molested by this priest, a known molester when he got his sullied hands on you.

      Please don’t shoulder a guilt that rightly belongs to Father Scoles and those who recycled, protected and covered-up for him. The guilt belongs to them, not you. You were a child. Just a child. The guilt is theirs, not yours.

      I personally think you really do need to tell your wife. You should not exclude her from that part of your life. You need her as you walk this new chapter in your life, and she needs you. If you don’t share this part of your life you are building a wall between you, one that will cause nothing but trouble between you.

      And, finally, don’t turn to drugs or alcohol. You know from past experience it won’t make things better. Be proud of the time yo have been sober, and stick with it. Let your wife be your solace.

      Once you have shared with your wife, you can decide together whether it would be wise to let your parents know. Talk it out between you. Think it through. It may just be a tremendous relief for them to know. Painful, yes, but possibly a great relief to know. Plus, they without doubt can recall events and comments made by Scoles which will be of assistance to both you and your lawyer as you proceed.

      1abandonedsheep says: “Been there, done that.” He knows what he is talking about. There are many who follow Sylvia’s Site who know exactly what you are going through right now. You are not alone.

      Stay strong Adam. Stay strong.

      My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  15. SD says:

    Adam,
    My advice to you is to seek professional counseling. Don’t let this control your life anymore. Pissing on his grave will treat your symptoms but will not cure the disease he has transmitted to your mind through the act of molestation(s). Reaching out on this site was a brilliant step forward in achieving your ultimate goal of healing. Monetary compensation won from the church will help greatly too. Seek out mind healing from every source possible for your sake, your wife’s sake and your children’s sake. If you reveal what happened to your parents reassure them that is was not there fault. I still do that to this very day as my parents feel guilty that they did not prevent the predatory efforts of James B Scoles on myself and my 3 brothers. All of varying degrees and the lasting effects of his dirty legacy. My parents are into their 80’s and have coped. Do what you have to do to get by Adam just don’t imbibe in the things that will cut your life short ie drugs and alcohol , otherwise what’s the point?

  16. SD says:

    Also would like to ad that Jim Scoles was a master at manipulation. Even today I want to defend him, strange that I would want to that. However he had the silver tongue. Said all the right things to disarm parents and potential victims. Even post incarceration in the early 2000’s I personally witnessed him attempting to groom a young lad with the promise of help with the boys parental breakup . Offered his phone number and stated anytime he wanted he could call or visit. Fortunately my mother who had been down this road previously intervened. She blew up and angerly reminded James B Scoles he was on probation and even if he wasn’t that she would kindly remove what defined him as a man with one slice if he continued with his manipulation. It worked. He complied. And as he aged he became much less of a threat. My mother still feels weighed down by guilt after he molestec my oldest brother in the early 1960’s. She confronted him and warned him to shape up. He did not heed this threat. He went on to molest many. And the church felt it could help by shifting him from parish to parish would solve the problem. Instead they only succeeded in spreading his disease. He had so many great qualities about him, too bad he used them cloak himself as a monster in a saviours clothing…….

    • Adam says:

      Thank you everyone for you’re kind words and prayers.
      I am pleased to say that my sobriety has continued unabated,
      although not easy by any stretch .
      However I find joy and fulfilment in my children especially this time of year..
      I have sought and found a councillor that has been a great help in
      Assisting me face and try to overcome my sexual abuse by james scoles
      The immediate support and kind words really brought me out of the dark,
      Thank you for all the work Sylvia as I imagine this is no easy feat.
      Much anger and shame has been lifted simply by talking to my wife and councillor also the support I received here has taken the toxicity inside away.
      This is going to be a long road but to know I’m not alone anymore is a great relief..
      Today Dad and I went to jarvinski cancer centre for some radiation treatments to manage his pain from the cancer that has been ravaging his body .
      The mood was lifted as I told him over coffee that I was now clean and sober!
      We toasted to that in the cafateria and shared a special moment.
      Some here have suggested that I tell my parents about scoles but Mom and Dad were marriage councillors with the Parrish and brought him in to the fold of our family .. With dads terminal illness I think this would only add additional pain and anxiety to them both so for now it will stay away from them so they can
      Have this special time together in relative peace..
      Thanks again everyone who responded I’m not better but working on it now instead of destroying myself .
      Merry Christmas

      • 1abandonedsheep says:

        Adam, I still am praying for you. I pray this will be the best Christmas you have had in many years.
        The best celebration comes when you acknowledge the gift of sobriety , which you have by the Grace of God, your own co-operation with that Grace, and, I hope, the friendship and understanding you can find in AA.
        That is how I have survived more than 33 years of sobriety- after getting sober when I was 47.
        The JOY truly is in the journey back to a good, sober, clean life, and being truly aware of what is going on around us and our family.
        May God hold you in the palm of His hand forever.

  17. Patricia Adair Korn says:

    My son attended Holy Rosary Parish and was an altar boy in the early 1980’s while Scoles was a priest. I have always wondered if my son knew of the abuse himself. I have never asked him about this time.

    Perhaps Adam knew my son?

  18. db says:

    I was an alter boy in the early 70’s during Scoles time at St. Basil’s Luckily I was unscathed by him but some of my friends were. Years later we always wondered why these guys had changed and become unfriendly and uncaring. When the truth finally came out, we figured these guys had been molested. My mother was a strict and loyal catholic follower and this just about killed her since Scoles married my sisters, ate dinner at our house, blessed our house and spent time with me (“unscathed once again”) This was the final straw in my struggle with religion and I am now an atheist and have raised 2 sons with no religion and both beautiful young men with big hearts. My shock is the fact that no one is seeing the bigger picture of the diocese hiding this and allowing it to happen continuously. This tells me that the church is a large hide away for pedophiles. This is not an isolated incident and should never have happened if “the men in charge” were truly Christians.

  19. Rob says:

    Cheers to that.
    I used to think that I had a shroud over me that screamed Gay, when in actuality it was hiding me from people knowing wht really happened.
    I am retired ( forced retirement ) because of my physical disabilities as well as My PTSD.
    The Diocese that I settled out of court included 6 weeks in a Survivors Program for sexually abused victims.. That did not go well as In a group of 20. I was the only one homosexually abused by a figure of highly respected Authority..
    Thus 6 weeks in club med, listening to rape victims.. did not help much.. I mad some friends, but they usually forgot me because their personal treatment, included ECT therapy.. Shock Treatment..yikes.
    But I have always been untrustful of any and all authorities.
    I treat ppl as I would like to be treated. I leave them alone..
    I am a severe introvert. I have a wife, 3 step children and 9 step grandchildren.
    I never had children of my own as I always feared that I would be a bad father figure.

    • db says:

      It makes me so angry that these people keep getting protected and put in a position of trust and authority while the victims like yourself go through a life of hell trying to recover.
      I hope you are able to find peace in your life and I also hope that all the victims will put a class action lawsuit and put the Catholic church into bankruptcy.

  20. rn says:

    This f**ker would eat dinner at my house in Brantford in the late 70’s and my mother just thought the world of him, these catholics blinded by ill placed faith follow these types of predators without question. Believing them over their own children – disgusting. I told her that he was a molester and she accused me of being evil and without god. Will there ever be an end to all these bullsh*t cover ups that still go on today, this monster is dead and good riddance to human garbage like that. I would say burn in hell, but we all know, there isn’t one.
    Peace to all

  21. Mich says:

    I attended holy rosary school until I graduated in 1986. Father scholes had dinner often at our house and my mother worshipped him. I know many that victimized over the years and I’m sickened that the church protected him. My thought and prayers to all of you.

  22. db says:

    He had dinner at all of our houses. He knew how to play the game. My mother would have never believed me over him. Our parents were so convinced these so-called holy men could do no wrong.
    And they wonder why all the kids are atheists. Duh

  23. Rob Disano says:

    Yes.. Who can forget his light blue Chrysler.. I rode to Florida and Back in it. My Grandparent in Lakeland fed us dinner. I would have asked to stay. But there was no way to get home, without letting my parents know my shame.
    I survived and so can you.
    Stay Strong and forward onward and upward.
    R.

  24. RD says:

    I hate this piece of shit! I am glad he is dead and I hope he is burning in hell! You are a disgusting disgrace to the Catholic religion! You should’ve been dropped in a hole filled with gasoline and had someone throw in a lit match. Horrible disgrace and on innocent children!

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